Friday, November 20, 2009

Friday, finally

Had several Clomid meltdowns this week - At least that's what I'm blaming them on anyway! Sunday and last night. Last night was traffic and road rage induced. I was trying to meet DH for happy hour and to make a long story short I didn't make it due to ridonkulous traffic. I actually cried... Damn you Clomid. AND I'm still waiting to ovulate. Come on body, stop making me wait! I wnat to get IUI#2 done this weekend or early next week before we have to go away for Thanksgiving!

Anyway, after the most boring week of work ever it's finally Friday! 2 more hours to go and I'm getting my nails done and relaxing with a beer - or 2.... Ahhhh....

Today wasn't so bad. Played hooky from work and went to the mall with my sister after lunch. We mostly looked at baby clothes for her little bun in the oven, Oliver. I can't wait to meet that boy!

Next week is Thanksgiving. I go so back and forth on if I'm thankful for what I DO have or pissed of becuase of what I don't - the ability to have a child on our own. I know most people don't understand the pain associated with infertility so it's hard to verbalize it. Mostly I just try not to talk about it with anyone...

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

The Longest Month Ever

At least it seemed that way to me. The beginning of the month started with our appointment with the RE. Financially our only option right now is IUI - IVF is 100% OOP and we just can't afford that right now. Our RE thinks the chances of a BFP with IUI are slim but is willing to try. IVF is the best choice but unfortunately not in the cards for us now...

So... we are taken into the ultrasound room right away to check my ovaries to make sure it's safe to start Clomid this month. Everything looked good and AF arrived the next day.

CD 5-9 50 mg of Clomid before bed
CD 12-17 OPK's! Got my positive on October 21st, IUI scheduled for October 22nd.
CD 17 - IUI #1

November 6 - BFFN and AF arrives

So that's where we are. A FAIL for our first try and I was so disappointed. I tried really hard to hide it and keep my head up and I feel like I did an OK job... I have to just focus on the future I suppose and start focusing on IUI #2.

I hope those numbers go up again. We could sure use a higher post wash score!

A lot has changed in 5 months...

Where do I start??

July was a difficult month. After our first RE appointment we had our first SA done. NOT good resluts - 4.7 million, 49% motility and 2% morphology. There you go, no wonder we haven't gotten pregnant! I remember when we got the results and I exhaled and felt like I'd never inhale again. Our dreams of conceiving on our own or having a surprise announcement to our families was over. I was devestated - absolutely devestated. However, I just started doing my research on what our options might be and more importantly what they might cost...

RE didn't want to do much more until a 2nd SA to confirm the 1st. We did that one about 8 weeks later, the beginning of September. Results were better but still not good. 10.7 million, 37% motility and 2% morph. So on to see a Urologist to see if there was anything he could do.

After MORE waiting we saw the Urologist who unfortunately could not do anything to help us. Waited for another appointment with out RE to decide what we would do...