Monday, May 10, 2010

Blah, Blah, Blah

This is just how I'm feeling today. And it is not very enjoyable... Before IF I was so happy-go-lucky. Nothing phased me - I had a great house, fun DH, supportive family and friends - I was content. Life was fun! Then I got run over by the IF bus...

Do you know how frustrating it is to not feel content? To feel like you are waiting either for something good to happen to you or for yet ANOTHER pregnancy announcement from someone IRL? My DH even just asked me "who did you find out is pregnant?" just because I'm not myself today. Don't get me wrong, I am very lucky to have the things I do and I'm thankful for my life and all the blessings I have. I just feel like I'm waiting for something to make my life meaningful. Does that make any sense at all or am I just a crazy person?

If it's not a child what will it be? A new job? A new house? My DH magically making buckets of money so I can stay at home and be a SAHW (LOL, that will NEVER happen!) I'm not actively looking for anything different in any of these areas so why would any of them change? I almost wish my DH would find a good job out of state and we could start over fresh. New jobs, hopefully new insurance (that covers IVF!!), new house, new everything.

I am feeling the urge to have a clean slate...

1 comment:

  1. Ugh, I am so sorry you feel like that. I can remember feeling that way- like IF had just taken over my life and I didnt know who I was anymore.

    I just wanted to share with you what I did because it really helped me at the time. I made my 101 list based on this site:

    http://www.dayzeroproject.com/

    By doing it, I was able to take back my life and start living it again. Sounds cheesy, but I really did feel that way.

    Hang in there, Im thinking of you.

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